Welcome to my Candy Store!

Hi my name is KimE and I like booze!!!! And I feel sharing my knowledge with all. Partly because i am so excited i get to try something new soon!
Anyways Welcome to my Candy Store


Let me just say this blog is going to focus on liquor even though i like my beer and wine and champagne too don't get the wrong idea.
Lets start with my donts like black liquorish
I got two
1. Schnapps Ugh Please take my word for it rainbow puke sucks,for some reason i had a Bad Romance with AfterShock and HotDamn when i was 16 not sure what i saw in either know. Uh and Gross all the Puckers! BLAH I would rather drink Boone's Farm than any of the above.

Stay away from the above and dont let the pretty colors fool you. Plus Schnapps are a fruity waste of time.
P.S. Also at a nightclub in a test tube shot they dont taste any better, dont listen to waitresses
2. Creamy liquors (OH God i think i just puked in my mouth a bit)
Buttery Nipple BLAH
and yet another Bad Romance when i was 17 Tequila Rose, once again Pink throwup Still not pretty

I will tell you one things the disastrous love affairs did teach me how to party like a rockstar my motto If you puke you are just making room for more!
Enough of the Bad lets get to the goodies.
1. Vodka
Basic you can mix it with any juice i like it with orange, cranberry or grapefruit personally. And yes i must admit i am a liquor snob but when you love something you got to do it right so i recommend Ciroq and Grey Goose, especially Grey Goose Orange.
I like Martinis, but i like my Martinis dirty actually the dirtier the better. But i will always love JELLO SHOTS, they cant be beat. Yes jello Shots are good colors you can trust them

My Expert Tip Swallow dont Chew!
Good God I almost lost my Vodka expert card Lemon Drop shots are so Yummy they really do taste like candy
2. Before i get to my LOVER i want to introduce to any party night warm up guy JAGER BOMBS

YagerBombs are a cup of Redbull, I prefer Rockstar personally and then in a shot glass you pour a shot of Jagermiester and then you take that shot and drop it glass in all in the RedBull cup then chug it all like one big shot. My expert tip start all nights out clubing with atleast two or three JagerBombs!
3. Now to my LOVER Tequila Nectar from the Agave Gods!
Tip 1 Margaritas shall always be drank on the rocks more liquor that way
Tip 2 Mexican martinis are the best margaritas ever!
Once again I like OK Tequila Good Tequila is VERY VERY VERY expensive but I recommend Patron hands down I also like, 1800, Cabo Wabo (Sammy hagars Tequila thats half the fun of it)
Oddly i found myself oddly tongue tied and lost for words about Tequila.

(I totally bogarded this next tidbit off the web but wanted to be accurate)
Mexican law requires tequila to be made with at least 51% blue agave (the other 49% is usually sugarcane). Look for varieties labeled "100% Blue Agave"—these are considered best.
Tequila is generally bottled at 80 proof, although some aged versions may have higher alcohol levels. The different grades of tequila include:
Blanco (also known as white, silver or plata)—Bottled soon after distillation, this "fresh" tequila has a smooth, fruity flavor with hints of herbs and pepper.
Joven Abocado (also known as oro or gold)—This tequila blanco is colored and flavored with ingredients like caramelized sugar, oak tree extracts or glycerin to give it a smoother taste similar to aged varieties.
Reposado—Also flavored and colored, this higher grade has been stored in wood barrels for two to 12 months. The aging gives it a more mellow character and hints of vanilla and spice.
Anejo—As the highest grade tequila, this variety is aged for at least one year. Extra anejo has been aged for three years or longer, and tequilas known as reserva have been aged five to 10 years. Anejos have a smooth, elegant, complex flavor that is often compared to fine cognac.
Last Tip I always like my Tequila in shot form or just straight out of the bottle

Besides the pure satisfaction for a drunk to right about all my lovies i had a point behind this blog at one point i think, yes anyways what inspired this is Absinthe is now legal in the states yes i know it has been for a bit but dammit i live under a rock, dont watch the news to much to depressing. Anyways I cant wait to find a bottle my lame ass liquor store doesnt have any and try it. i get to be all cool like lighting sugar i think on fire first or something hmmm maybe i beter google how to prepare properly........
a dose of absinthe into a glass, then place a sugar cube on an absinthe spoon or teaspoon.2Soak the sugar in absinthe by dipping it into the absinthe with the spoon or pouring a little absinthe over it.3 Flaming absinthe-soaked sugar cube over glass of absintheLight the absinthe-soaked sugar on fire for about one minute, allowing the sugar caramelize and melt (This is not recommended because it can be extremely dangerous due to the high alcohol content which makes the absinthe very flammable). If an absinthe spoon is used, the burning, melted sugar should drip into the absinthe.
LMAO that the Bohemian method and yes i snatched that again from net
Blah blah fuck me copy writers


P.S. DEAR ABSINTHE PLEASE LET ALL THE RUMORS BE TRUE, LOVE ALWAYS KIME

Peotry

Sorry peeps but i am your Genius, when i got bored today i doodled a poem on my doodle pad, i was so proud of it i was almost brought to tears, but it turned out the poem sucks and i had a eyelash in my eye.
Well you know those poems you write in like Kindergarten where you write something for every letter, i did that for m y lovely friend Xanax but fuck had to rework it because on doodle pad in was Xanex fuck spelling grrr.
Xylophones are cool
Anxiety is not
Nervousness
Also is not cool, Thank God for
XANAX!

PS for the people who dont know any better blue will knock you right on your ass, they strong
I am thinking i could make a whole book of of anxiety medication poems just to name a few we got

Celexa
Paxil
Effexor
Lexapro
Zoloft
Lyrica
Prozac
But No worries Peeps i am not going to so fuck better find someone else do give my literary achievement award to
Anyways Thanks for reading and wasting your time with me
So now i will share a bit of my knowledge with yall
Speaking of Xylophones not sure what we plays but on Rockabye Baby Lullaby Cd's are awesome i love them to bits and pieces

Here is a real poem from a actual great poet

Why the desire for death.

A clean paper or pure white wall.
One false
line, a scratch, a mistake.
Unerasable. So obscureby
adding million other
tracings, blend it
,cover over.
But the original scratch
remains, written in
gold blood, shining.

Desire for a Perfect Life
-Jim Morrison
KIME

Evil, Hell and Devil OH MY

You better get use to quotes because i like the i mean why the fuck should i have a original thought when no-one else does besides i have killed way to many fucking braincell and had fun doing it most of the time, to waste the remains few i have on this blog! For those of you who dont know me i am Kim, i am the human behind @BaronVonOdem the coolest fucking polygamous cult leading chocolate lab on twitter! So i suddenly start griping about anipals know i am only half crazy we have this whole lets pretend life style we create on twitter that is very clique and like returning to highschool. Psst dont tell anyone but anipals and really human! But please is i start to bark or want milk bones somebody slap me and up my meds.
Fuck Fuck Hell Hell Blah Blah
Anyways here are some lovely Evil Hell and Devil Quotes and even a few comments added by me after all this is my blog.
KimE (bows at with a flourish and a flick of the wrist flips everyone the bird) ENJOY
1. Hell is empty all the devils are here -William Shakespeare
2. Go to heaven for the climate, Hell for the company -Mark Twain
3. Every man is his own hell -HL Mencken Welcome to mine now reader
4. Maybe this world is another planets hell -Aldous Huxley
5. You may all go to hell, and i will go to Texas - Davy Crockett Sorry i am a proud TEXAN
6. Somehow our devils are never quite what we expect when we meet them face to face -Nelson DeMillie
7. Gossip is the Devils radio -George Harrison And guess what i have been called the devil before and i love music the juicier the better LOL So feel free to hit my up with the good shit anytime
8. When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before -Mae West
9. The sun also shines on the wicked -Seneca
10. Hear no evil, speak no evil - and you'll never be invited to a party -Oscar Wilde
11. The devil was the first democrat -Lord Byron
12. People who say money is the root of all evil dont have any Oh hell yes i did go there and yes i am a bitch i think Ayn Rand says it best "Run for your life from and many who tells you that money is evil. That sentence is the leper's bell of an approaching looter"
13. Evil is unspectacular and always human -WH Auden Good thing i am a dog oh wait a fucking minute i am a human pretending to be my dog, well shit i am fucked
14. Capital as such is not evil, it is its wrong use that is evil. Capital in some form will always be needed -Gandhi Suck it you socialist bastards (cough cough Obama cough)
15. Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction -Blaise Pascal So look at yourself you bible thumpers before you judge me because most of you dont know shit about me